- Location
- Andorra and Spain
So true...
Do not punish the behaviour you want to see
- Thread starter snowbunny
- Start date
Boogie
Moderator
- Location
- Manchester UK
Ay - men!
I’m dyslexic and used to get this all the time.
I put in 20 times the effort for no reward at all, just ‘could do better if she made some effort’
As a teacher I always rewarded effort, not just results.
.
I’m dyslexic and used to get this all the time.
I put in 20 times the effort for no reward at all, just ‘could do better if she made some effort’
As a teacher I always rewarded effort, not just results.
.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Very good to remember, for dogs and humans.
Lisa
Moderator
- Location
- Alberta, Canada
Yes, good advice. Seems like it should be a no-brainer, doesn’t it? 
- Location
- Canberra, Australia
Sure should be. I know a few people who need this advice....and I’ve definitely been guilty of it myself (hopefully mostly in the past!!).
- Location
- Argyll & Bute, Scotland
Mags, how difficult was it to be a teacher with Dyslexia? I think effort is in some ways more important than results. I always put 100% effort in for little result, story of my lifeAy - men!
I’m dyslexic and used to get this all the time.
I put in 20 times the effort for no reward at all, just ‘could do better if she made some effort’
As a teacher I always rewarded effort, not just results.
.
xx
Boogie
Moderator
- Location
- Manchester UK
I became Advanced Skills teacher and deputy headteacher, I was acting headteacher for 12 months too.Mags, how difficult was it to be a teacher with Dyslexia? I think effort is in some ways more important than results. I always put 100% effort in for little result, story of my life
Dyslexia gives many things. Perseverance, resilience, empathy, creativity, an ability to see things ‘in the round’, people skills, spatial reasoning, interconnected thinking etc. Even though spelling and writing are difficult. These days (once you can read and write) computers also make things much easier!
As a teacher I was very good at teaching the ‘differently wired’ children - all the ‘dys’ people, especially this with ADHD as I have this too.
Once you have those children on your side teaching is easy.
.
- Location
- Close to Devon/Somerset border
Sadly, its one of those things people do without thinking - like a spontaneous reaction. I've a horrible feeling I've probably been guilty of this myself when the children were younger 
Often too busy and slightly irritable a lot of the time, that's when this sort of situation happens. Not an excuse but I've seen it time and again.
Often too busy and slightly irritable a lot of the time, that's when this sort of situation happens. Not an excuse but I've seen it time and again.
- Location
- Argyll & Bute, Scotland
I wish my son Joseph who has high functioning autism had had teachers like you as he obviously wired very differently. On the whole he did have some amazing teachers who I am eternally grateful too.As a teacher I was very good at teaching the ‘differently wired’ children - all the ‘dys’ people, especially this with ADHD as I have this too.
Once you have those children on your side teaching is easy.
.
My daughter Grace is doing a job as a TA in a secondary school for a year until she goes back to Uni to do her PGCE in secondary schooling next year. A very difficult school with very challenging pupils a large proportion are special needs. She is making headway with the autistic and dyslexic children. I will pass on your words of wisdom
xx
Boogie
Moderator
- Location
- Manchester UK
Oh me too!Sadly, its one of those things people do without thinking - like a spontaneous reaction. I've a horrible feeling I've probably been guilty of this myself when the children were younger
Often too busy and slightly irritable a lot of the time, that's when this sort of situation happens. Not an excuse but I've seen it time and again.
As a parent I lacked patience - I’d used it all up at school. I didn’t ever allow sleepovers, I’d had enough of children by bedtime!
My boys turned out fine even with only a ‘good enough’ parent.
Don’t beat yourself up xx
- Location
- Wellington, NZ
We ALL do it, especially women who seem to be schooled in the art of passive aggression from a young age. It's terrible, and it's something that we do without even realising it. I've only become aware of it in the past couple of years and it's such a hard habit to break. And you're right, it rears its ugly head when you're tired and grumpy. All you (the "royal" you) can do is keep working on the way you react to things. Whoever said "sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me" was a f***ing moron.Sadly, its one of those things people do without thinking - like a spontaneous reaction. I've a horrible feeling I've probably been guilty of this myself when the children were younger
Often too busy and slightly irritable a lot of the time, that's when this sort of situation happens. Not an excuse but I've seen it time and again.
Atemas
UK Tour Guide
- Location
- North Cambridgeshire
Perfect example of this - my 9 year old granddaughter was here this morning - I take her to school sometimes. They have a star system in their school. It is very difficult to earn the 5 stars throughout their primary school life - they are not given out without achieving a very high criteria. Granddaughter has 3 on her collar - I am extremely proud of her as her self esteem has not always been brilliant but is now coming through. She has also been elected by her class onto the school council so has a large badge on her cardigan for that. DH got back from walk, met her in hall, chatting to her and said ‘still only 3 stars’ in a light hearted jokey way. I gave him the ‘evils look’. He probably thought he was being funny. I will be having words at some point!!
- Location
- Canberra, Australia
The kids are labelled with stars on their collars? Geez, I feel for the zero star children.
Atemas
UK Tour Guide
- Location
- North Cambridgeshire
I have never thought of that in that way and I have been a lifelong educator.
- Location
- Canberra, Australia
As a separate thing though... it’s great that your granddaughter is doing so well and is building up her self-confidence. It’s definitely something to be very proud of to be elected onto the school council - she’s obviously respected and well liked by her classmates.
Candy
Biscuit Tin Guardian
- Location
- West Yorkshire, UK
Many of the most creative people I've known have also been Dyslexic. Letters aren't everything. Dogs don't need them and look how wonderful they are.I became Advanced Skills teacher and deputy headteacher, I was acting headteacher for 12 months too.
Dyslexia gives many things. Perseverance, resilience, empathy, creativity, an ability to see things ‘in the round’, people skills, spatial reasoning, interconnected thinking etc. Even though spelling and writing are difficult. These days (once you can read and write) computers also make things much easier!
As a teacher I was very good at teaching the ‘differently wired’ children - all the ‘dys’ people, especially this with ADHD as I have this too.
Once you have those children on your side teaching is easy.
.
Candy
Biscuit Tin Guardian
- Location
- West Yorkshire, UK
Aged 12- 13-14, many many years ago I was dreadful at Latin, terrified of the Latin teacher and of the whole new posh big school I'd landed in after my little friendly primary school. To be fair, I don't remember crushing experiences like those described by Snowbunny, but still I was lost and terrified. Every Friday in assembly the detentions for the week were read out and if you had one you had to stand up infront of the whole school. We all sat crosslegged on the floor for assembly, so standing up meant you really stood out. Yet again the whole thing horrified me, so I was careful never to get a detention (yes, you might have guessed it, I was GoodGirlCandy!) The other things that were read out in Friday assembly though were commendations. One Friday, I remember I was 13, I had a commendation read out. It was for effort in Latin. My face must have been a picture and I remember being completely amazed that this teacher who terrified me had actually noticed that I was trying. It all suddenly felt much less scarey. Over the years she gave me commendations for several other not typically academic things, the ones I particularly remember were kindness to others, originality of thought, interesting conversation and sharing of humour. She was the only teacher who gave public praise for qualities other than being academically bright and over the years I grew to respect and love the very things about her that had at first terrified me. She remained strict but I came to learn that she applied the same rules to herself as she did to us. By the time I was 18 she was my form teacher and was overseeing my A level English ( I was better at that than Latin) From being a frightening person, she had become someone who was very much on my side. She was without doubt the teacher who has had the greatest influence on my life and has been a good, brave and inspiring influence ever since.Interestingly enough, she wasn't one of the young teachers, I would think she must have been well into her 50s when I knew her. Long post, I know, but she remains an inspiration to me and what Snowbunny was saying really struck a chord for me. So very, very true. If there's anyone out there who remembers Elizabeth Hassel, well,................ Here's to her!
Candy
Biscuit Tin Guardian
- Location
- West Yorkshire, UK
No, but that would have been such a lovely coincidence! She was based in Bushey, Hertfordshire. She never married and would be over a hundred years old by now I would think (she was definitely older than my parents and they would have been in their 90s now.) Maybe a distant relative? Nice of you to think about it though.xx
- Location
- Herefordshire, UK
But well worth the read, thank you for sharing. She sounds a wonderful person and a gifted teacher.