Atemas
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- North Cambridgeshire
Just to set the scene - I am 68, retired after a very busy professional life that had huge responsibilities. I am married to F who is younger than me so still working but mostly from home. We have a large family - two very elderly mum’s (mine is 96), 4 children and their partners and 4 grandchildren. Ours lives are busy, varied and active.
In February last year, we came home with Red, our eight week old puppy. We already had Sky a black Labrador who was then 10 years old. We got her when she was 5 months old so she came toilet trained and sleeping through the night. We had planned this second dog, we had everything ready for her and I was excited to be getting her. Our friends did look oddly at us when we said we were getting a puppy. Their expressions came back to haunt me during the next few months.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the sheer hard work of a very young puppy. I also didn’t expect Sky to reject Red but she wouldn’t have anything to do with her. So we had to keep them apart and try to keep Sky’s life as she knew it the same. She also had arthritis confirmed so we had to get to grips with medication and reduced walks. I more or less took up residence in the kitchen for a few months. Red’s crate was in there and I had good access to the garden. I spent a lot of time in the garden - it was freezing cold, dark and I was in and out the house like a yo-yo. Red didn’t bark (she does now!) so initially I was coming down early morning to a wet and soiled crate. The days seemed endless and bit by bit, I felt a huge dark cloud descend on me. I also hadn’t realised that Labrador pups like to bite and getting ‘attacked’ on a daily basis wasn’t very pleasant either. I felt guilty ‘cos all of a sudden this tiny bundle had taken over my life and I was unable to do the things for my family or myself I was used to doing. I really missed my freedom. Red had digestive problems too. She hated the car at first. Going to puppy training was a nightmare initially. We seemed to live at the vets. I wanted my ‘old’ life back. Daily I would wail ‘I can’t do this’ and I would ‘flip’ from ‘this puppy has to go back’ to ‘but I love her’. It got very scary. I couldn’t eat and the weight dropped off me. F kept reassuring me, it would get better but I just couldn’t see it. Getting up twice a night to take Red out to the garden, meant hugely disturbed nights and I couldn’t sleep. Not being able to sleep and not being able to eat took their toil and I got very depressed. F and the family and our friends got very worried about me. The lowest point came one morning, taking Red out for her morning wee and I passed out, coming to on the lawn, finding her jumping all over me and F having to carry me inside. I felt so ill. Scary. However, bit by bit Red became less of a crocopup, started to sleep all night, started to respond to training and the cloud slowly lifted. Didn’t happen overnight and it took several months. By the six month point, we had managed to get both dogs together successfully but that’s a story in itself.
If you are still reading......Puppy Blues can happen to anyone.......I look back and still find it shocking it happened to me - I thought I was ‘old and wise’ and had enough life experiences behind me to take on a puppy! Apart from having a very loving, kind and supportive partner, I also found a group of on line fellow Labrador owners who daily said ‘This will pass’ - their words helped me enormously and I shall never forget their kindness. Just knowing others out there had experienced similar things made a big difference. You can’t underestimate the sheer physical nature of having a young puppy. Combine that with sleep deprivation and it so easily leads to Puppy Blues. If you are feeling this way then this forum is the right place to vent, share the good and the bad or ask for advice.
In February last year, we came home with Red, our eight week old puppy. We already had Sky a black Labrador who was then 10 years old. We got her when she was 5 months old so she came toilet trained and sleeping through the night. We had planned this second dog, we had everything ready for her and I was excited to be getting her. Our friends did look oddly at us when we said we were getting a puppy. Their expressions came back to haunt me during the next few months.
What I wasn’t prepared for was the sheer hard work of a very young puppy. I also didn’t expect Sky to reject Red but she wouldn’t have anything to do with her. So we had to keep them apart and try to keep Sky’s life as she knew it the same. She also had arthritis confirmed so we had to get to grips with medication and reduced walks. I more or less took up residence in the kitchen for a few months. Red’s crate was in there and I had good access to the garden. I spent a lot of time in the garden - it was freezing cold, dark and I was in and out the house like a yo-yo. Red didn’t bark (she does now!) so initially I was coming down early morning to a wet and soiled crate. The days seemed endless and bit by bit, I felt a huge dark cloud descend on me. I also hadn’t realised that Labrador pups like to bite and getting ‘attacked’ on a daily basis wasn’t very pleasant either. I felt guilty ‘cos all of a sudden this tiny bundle had taken over my life and I was unable to do the things for my family or myself I was used to doing. I really missed my freedom. Red had digestive problems too. She hated the car at first. Going to puppy training was a nightmare initially. We seemed to live at the vets. I wanted my ‘old’ life back. Daily I would wail ‘I can’t do this’ and I would ‘flip’ from ‘this puppy has to go back’ to ‘but I love her’. It got very scary. I couldn’t eat and the weight dropped off me. F kept reassuring me, it would get better but I just couldn’t see it. Getting up twice a night to take Red out to the garden, meant hugely disturbed nights and I couldn’t sleep. Not being able to sleep and not being able to eat took their toil and I got very depressed. F and the family and our friends got very worried about me. The lowest point came one morning, taking Red out for her morning wee and I passed out, coming to on the lawn, finding her jumping all over me and F having to carry me inside. I felt so ill. Scary. However, bit by bit Red became less of a crocopup, started to sleep all night, started to respond to training and the cloud slowly lifted. Didn’t happen overnight and it took several months. By the six month point, we had managed to get both dogs together successfully but that’s a story in itself.
If you are still reading......Puppy Blues can happen to anyone.......I look back and still find it shocking it happened to me - I thought I was ‘old and wise’ and had enough life experiences behind me to take on a puppy! Apart from having a very loving, kind and supportive partner, I also found a group of on line fellow Labrador owners who daily said ‘This will pass’ - their words helped me enormously and I shall never forget their kindness. Just knowing others out there had experienced similar things made a big difference. You can’t underestimate the sheer physical nature of having a young puppy. Combine that with sleep deprivation and it so easily leads to Puppy Blues. If you are feeling this way then this forum is the right place to vent, share the good and the bad or ask for advice.
