- Location
- Buckinghamshire UK
I am so sorry Flona. My thoughts ( and tears ) are with you and J.
Nisha Noo
- Thread starter snowbunny
- Start date
- Location
- Wellington, NZ
Rachael and Emily said it best. I'm so sorry. I hate the people that traumatised her so badly.
- Location
- Argyll & Bute, Scotland
Run free without pain or fear darling Nisha xxx For J 
and for you Fiona xx
and for you Fiona xx
- Location
- Andorra and Spain
We brought Nisha's ashes home yesterday. I've never been in this position before. I'm trying to make the decision as to what to do with them. Of course I know it doesn't matter, she's gone and it's just a gesture for myself, but still. I don't want to plant a specific plant or tree for her because I'll feel horrible when I inevitably kill it. So I'm thinking more of a little garden of remembrance with pretty flowers where I can go and sit and and feel close to her, and that I can tend to and nurture and renew.
I'm feeling conflicted about where to put it, which is total nonsense. My practical side is saying it should be somewhere where we already spend time because I will spend more time there, and it will be better tended. That in time others will join the garden (not thinking about it, not thinking about it) and it will be a space for everyone. The other side of me is saying, she never got to visit this bit of our garden, won't she feel lost? Won't she be scared with us being so close to her? I told you it was nonsense. Stupid brain.
I'm feeling conflicted about where to put it, which is total nonsense. My practical side is saying it should be somewhere where we already spend time because I will spend more time there, and it will be better tended. That in time others will join the garden (not thinking about it, not thinking about it) and it will be a space for everyone. The other side of me is saying, she never got to visit this bit of our garden, won't she feel lost? Won't she be scared with us being so close to her? I told you it was nonsense. Stupid brain.
Naya
Moderator
- Location
- Bristol, UK
I don’t think your thoughts are nonsense at all and I get what you are saying. Could you create a small garden area within the area that they were both in? That might help with you knowing she felt safe there?
- Location
- Argyll & Bute, Scotland
Definitely not nonsense, perfectly normal. I would think of it the other way round and have her ashes in your garden where you all sit, as that is what you so wished for Nisha, that she could join you all. She could finally be home with her forever family. xxx
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Whatever you decide will be right, but maybe just give yourself some time.
I put Brogan's ashes in a colourful box that was meant to be temporary and added the memorial silver angel dog pendant that I'd had made for Duncan on top of the tissue covering the ashes. It seemed suitable that Brogan should have that. Then I considered all sorts of things including jewellery with Brogan's ashes, scattering them in some of his favourite places, etc. In the meanwhile, I don't travel with his memory box (ashes plus clothes, SD harnesses, etc.) and they go to Helga's house for storage when I'm not in Regensburg. She pats the box and greets him each time he comes back to her house, and I do the same when I collect him again. It's now a routine. His framed photo travels with me and goes next to my bed, even at hotels. During the day, I move it to my work area where I can see it. All this works for me now and I actually don't want to change it to something more or less.
You just can't go wrong here.
I put Brogan's ashes in a colourful box that was meant to be temporary and added the memorial silver angel dog pendant that I'd had made for Duncan on top of the tissue covering the ashes. It seemed suitable that Brogan should have that. Then I considered all sorts of things including jewellery with Brogan's ashes, scattering them in some of his favourite places, etc. In the meanwhile, I don't travel with his memory box (ashes plus clothes, SD harnesses, etc.) and they go to Helga's house for storage when I'm not in Regensburg. She pats the box and greets him each time he comes back to her house, and I do the same when I collect him again. It's now a routine. His framed photo travels with me and goes next to my bed, even at hotels. During the day, I move it to my work area where I can see it. All this works for me now and I actually don't want to change it to something more or less.
Not nonsense at all. And this is my own belief for Nisha, but I really think she's not afraid anymore and is staying close to you, to get to know you in a way that her fears wouldn't let her in life. So if you want to make an area for her next to the house, that will be beautiful. If you want to make it her and Talia's area because it reminds you more of Nisha, that's beautiful too.
You just can't go wrong here.
You are returning her ashes to the place where she was loved and was comfortable and safe. Her ashes will become part of your home, and that is what counts, wherever exactly you decide the final place will be. Don't think of it as nonsense, I completely understand and fought with myself over where Billy and Bones' ashes should go, just as you are doing.
Just take your time and do what's best for you. I keep the ashes for a while then all of a sudden I get the urge to spread them on a favourite walk. Usually places the dogs loved. Do what feels right XX
- Location
- Canberra, Australia
There is no hurry.
The things you’re thinking aren’t nonsense, they’re love.
The things you’re thinking aren’t nonsense, they’re love.
- Location
- Cornwall , UK
No hurry , but your dear girl knew love and safety with you so maybe keep her close at hand , somewhere you can sit quietly and think of her .
Sam joined some of my other dogs at Golitha Falls , a place he adored x
Sam joined some of my other dogs at Golitha Falls , a place he adored x
Atemas
UK Tour Guide
- Location
- North Cambridgeshire
I think like others say, take your time and whatever you decide will be the right decision.
With Sky, neither of us wanted her ashes and I have never regretted that decision. Sky is always by my side and in my heart and head as she was in life.
You did such a lovely, selfless act for Talia by taking her and creating peace and security for the last few months of her life, it will be comforting to know her resting place is with you
With Sky, neither of us wanted her ashes and I have never regretted that decision. Sky is always by my side and in my heart and head as she was in life.
You did such a lovely, selfless act for Talia by taking her and creating peace and security for the last few months of her life, it will be comforting to know her resting place is with you
- Location
- Andorra and Spain
When the ferrets died, I was happy with the decision not to have their ashes or bodies to bury. With Nisha it felt different, somehow. I didn't want to "abandon" her again, and wanted her final resting place to be somewhere that mattered, where she was loved, just in case she can see and understand - which I don't believe she can, I'm SO not that person... but what if I'm wrong?
If one of the Labs had been the first to go, I don't know, I may not have wanted their ashes. They will always be a part of me, and have known nothing but love their whole lives. If there is any "seeing" from the great beyond, then they would know that they are with me always. Nisha didn't have that and I want to give her whatever I can, everything she deserves, even after death.
If one of the Labs had been the first to go, I don't know, I may not have wanted their ashes. They will always be a part of me, and have known nothing but love their whole lives. If there is any "seeing" from the great beyond, then they would know that they are with me always. Nisha didn't have that and I want to give her whatever I can, everything she deserves, even after death.
Atemas
UK Tour Guide
- Location
- North Cambridgeshire
Yes @snowbunny that’s what I was trying to say really - I so understand
- Location
- Cornwall , UK
There is no straight answer , no right or wrong . It is purely what feels right for you at the time x
- Location
- Malvern Worcestershire
Perhaps near you in the garden, if she is in the spirit, she won't feel fear anymore and will want to be near you. Whatever you decide will be right. My dog Drift is still in a cardboard box (casket inside) on my desk, I still cannot part with him, the others are in the garden. I would always bring their ashes back home.