I don't think you can downplay the impact of lockdown either. Lack of traditional training opportunities has had a big impact. Also we've had to stay at home or close to home so they've just not experienced a lot of things. Ivers behaviour changed when lockdown was over he became a lot more excitable worried and barky. It's taken him a little time to adjust and calm down.
Biting and mouthing is really wearing me down
- Thread starter Natalie
- Start date
And now he's fast asleep on my feet and being lovely and I'm crying all over again 
It's just the initial trigger and burst of excitement that is impossible to control. And with lockdown, we have simply avoided so many exciting places, rather than being able to train around them.
This is so true. We made 4/5 puppy classes at a school I didn't really like much. And got told to put him in a headcollar (which I might still do, but that's a different story). But he did calm down there, after the first 15 minutes. I could put him in a sit stay, drop the lead and walk around and away from him whilst another dog was only 3-4 metres away.
It's just the initial trigger and burst of excitement that is impossible to control. And with lockdown, we have simply avoided so many exciting places, rather than being able to train around them.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
I'm so sorry - the frustration and exhaustion you feel is obvious. It's completely understandable that you're at the end of your tether. 
Others here have/will give better advice, so I'm mainly adding myself to the sympathy brigade.
But of course I can't keep my mouth shut, even when I don't know what I'm talking about, so take the following with a grain of salt....
I do agree with @snowbunny about trying something new - though with the understanding that you may feel you HAVE tried everything! Nothing of the intensity of what you have with Bear, but I was feeling very out of sorts with Carbon a few weeks ago. That recall challenge that @Beanwood posted about was oddly the straw that broke the camel's back with me. It depressed the heck out of me that I've had Carbon for 3 years and he still has zero recall. Every time he ran towards another dog, I got so angry that I couldn't see straight. I felt like there was nothing we did together that we both enjoyed and all I was being was the prison warden keeping him from absconding or chasing after him once he had already absconded.
Before I had my week holiday, I decided to do something different and find something that we both enjoyed. I told myself I don't even think about recall anymore: I simply have a dog who will run away if given the chance. So I don't give him the chance. Or if I do and he runs, then don't get angry because I knew he would do it. Over the week we tried "church parkour" (thanks @HAH ), went on a boat ride, walked in town (which I know he enjoys from our time in Regensburg). We went surfing in the mornings when no one was around. I always love Carbon, but the shared activities helped me remember why I LIKE him too.
It wasn't perfect, but the side effect was that I'm not getting nearly as angry and frustrated and (no surprise) Carbon seems happier and more relaxed. His anxious tail thumping behaviour (similar but quieter to Bear in the video) is better and - maybe more importantly - doesn't irritate me nearly as much as it did a few weeks ago.
Your issues with Bear are very different, but what I'm taking a very long way of saying is that maybe just chuck out what you've been trying and do some stuff that reminds you of why you like Bear. Or take him out and try to interact with him as if you'd just met him and find out what there is to like about him.
Not sure if any of this even makes sense - bottom line: you're totally justified in feeling the way you do, but you'll come it of this.
Others here have/will give better advice, so I'm mainly adding myself to the sympathy brigade.
But of course I can't keep my mouth shut, even when I don't know what I'm talking about, so take the following with a grain of salt....
I do agree with @snowbunny about trying something new - though with the understanding that you may feel you HAVE tried everything! Nothing of the intensity of what you have with Bear, but I was feeling very out of sorts with Carbon a few weeks ago. That recall challenge that @Beanwood posted about was oddly the straw that broke the camel's back with me. It depressed the heck out of me that I've had Carbon for 3 years and he still has zero recall. Every time he ran towards another dog, I got so angry that I couldn't see straight. I felt like there was nothing we did together that we both enjoyed and all I was being was the prison warden keeping him from absconding or chasing after him once he had already absconded.
Before I had my week holiday, I decided to do something different and find something that we both enjoyed. I told myself I don't even think about recall anymore: I simply have a dog who will run away if given the chance. So I don't give him the chance. Or if I do and he runs, then don't get angry because I knew he would do it. Over the week we tried "church parkour" (thanks @HAH ), went on a boat ride, walked in town (which I know he enjoys from our time in Regensburg). We went surfing in the mornings when no one was around. I always love Carbon, but the shared activities helped me remember why I LIKE him too.
It wasn't perfect, but the side effect was that I'm not getting nearly as angry and frustrated and (no surprise) Carbon seems happier and more relaxed. His anxious tail thumping behaviour (similar but quieter to Bear in the video) is better and - maybe more importantly - doesn't irritate me nearly as much as it did a few weeks ago.
Your issues with Bear are very different, but what I'm taking a very long way of saying is that maybe just chuck out what you've been trying and do some stuff that reminds you of why you like Bear. Or take him out and try to interact with him as if you'd just met him and find out what there is to like about him.
Not sure if any of this even makes sense - bottom line: you're totally justified in feeling the way you do, but you'll come it of this.
Rorys brain races ahead so he's very like Bear he's fast and could be irratic. One of the trainer's we used pointed how quick he was and how quickly he went from one thing to another. I taught him tricks super sit spin and back up and when he starts to loose it I would ask for a trick which was emotionally and physically rewarding. It stopped him moving kept him still and focused on me. Slowed him down . At nearly 8 he still does his special spin he knows how it makes me smile he wants me to notice how clever he is. It's like Steffi said with Ripple these dogs need calm and slow.
Rorys 8 so it was pre the other place and this site when I was struggling. I had to totally change the way I did things with Rory for things to work. You will find a way it itakes time.
Atemas
UK Tour Guide
- Location
- North Cambridgeshire
You sound worn out @Natalie
. I am so sorry. I do remember that @Selina27 had challenges with Cassie as an older teenager (sorry @Selina27 if I am wrong here) grabbing, mouthing her arm that she systematically dealt with over a period of time. That alone must wear you down and I don’t understand the whining in the video but that would get to you as well. I don’t have advice but I do understand what you are saying about Monty possibly being depressed - that must be upsetting. It has a sort of similarity to how Sky was when we got the puppy Red. The guilt of bringing ‘a problem’ for Sky was deeply upsetting and I remember that feeling very well.
Boogie
Moderator
- Location
- Manchester UK
Mollie was the arm/coat/anything on a human biter as a teenager - I still have a hole in my coat as a souvenir!
So, at that moment she's hanging on your sleeve, what did you actually do, and say?
Boogie
Moderator
- Location
- Manchester UK
First I held the lead at arms length so she couldn’t reach me, then I got the treats out and asked for a sit. After that I used treats all the way home. She could still take me unawares ‘tho. The walks were never relaxing!
Of course, she’s now a calm hard-working Guide Dog so those days are well behind her. Yours will be too.
ah right, so it was on walks, weirdly Bear never does this on lead, it's just at home when he's naked.First I held the lead at arms length so she couldn’t reach me, then I got the treats out and asked for a sit. After that I used treats all the way home. She could still take me unawares ‘tho. The walks were never relaxing!
Of course, she’s now a calm hard-working Guide Dog so those days are well behind her. Yours will be too.
I have a old jumper in a drawer which my beloved Douglas ripped from my back when he was young.Mollie was the arm/coat/anything on a human biter as a teenager - I still have a hole in my coat as a souvenir!
I'm only wearing old clothes now as they keep getting ruined. three tops on the washing line all have holes either in the back or the sleeves.
- Location
- Andorra and Spain
Why not make a diary to see if you can see any patterns?
Note:
- what exercise/enrichment/stimulation he's had
- what food he's had
- what time of day it is
- how you react to it and what you do immediately afterwards
- how long it takes him to calm down (defined by what you could classify as a "relaxed state", so being able to follow cues thoughtfully, or sitting/laying down under his own volition etc etc).
Note:
- what exercise/enrichment/stimulation he's had
- what food he's had
- what time of day it is
- how you react to it and what you do immediately afterwards
- how long it takes him to calm down (defined by what you could classify as a "relaxed state", so being able to follow cues thoughtfully, or sitting/laying down under his own volition etc etc).
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
- Location
- Herefordshire, UK
Yes I sure did
But differently to Bear @Natalie it happened outside on walks, when we were heading for home. I know now that she was totally over stimulated by her environment, given that she has high prey drive and is hunting driven. I understand her now. So I don't think I have any great solution.
I do agree though that a behaviourist/trainer would be a very good idea. I also think @joys suggestion of a diary of trigger factors would be helpful.
I think @SteffiS has a very good point too about some dogs just needing a calmer environment is very true.
They are just all so different, and finding the way forward can be so very tricky. But you will get through this. I think the key can be learning the individual triggers and motivation of the dog we have in front of us, and if you need the help of a professional then so be it . Sometimes we just need someone outside looking in to help us find the answer.
Jacqui-S
Moderator
- Location
- Fife, Scotland
No suggestions, just want to you.
you.
Just a million times this. It felt like forever to key in to Kipper, and we’re still sometimes utter dolts in understanding what he’s about. So many things might have been quicker with the right advice (and slower without it too!).
- Location
- Vlaardingen, the Netherlands
I wish I could help you!! It’s like I’m reading a diary of what I would have written with Finn....I cried a lot when he was that age....Didn’t have the help of some good friends like MLF....I felt lonely and regretted that I wanted a second dog. Euan did not like Finn either, but tolerated him. I lost quite a few kilo’s and they never came back. I always asked myself why I wanted that 2nd one.
There are a few things I learned in that time. I wouldn’t walk two dogs at the same time, but do it separately. Also, you learn his character better when seeing and playing with other dogs. I saw at the dog school that Finn got very excited and hyper when the group who was doing agility was practicing. So that was for me the sign not to do something like that with Finn.
Finn was a biting dog too. I learned him to take his cuddle when he wanted to hang in my jumper. Often I took his cuddle and presented him as a substitution for my jumper. As soon as i saw he wanted to grab or bite something I asked him to get his cuddle. And eventually he took his cuddle when feeling excited or to calm him down. With Finn it was also an expression of anxiety. Perhaps something similar with bear, as an explanation of the video? He is probably not feeling very well and perhaps he likes a something like a toy to calm him down like Finn does with his cuddle?
There are a few things I learned in that time. I wouldn’t walk two dogs at the same time, but do it separately. Also, you learn his character better when seeing and playing with other dogs. I saw at the dog school that Finn got very excited and hyper when the group who was doing agility was practicing. So that was for me the sign not to do something like that with Finn.
Finn was a biting dog too. I learned him to take his cuddle when he wanted to hang in my jumper. Often I took his cuddle and presented him as a substitution for my jumper. As soon as i saw he wanted to grab or bite something I asked him to get his cuddle. And eventually he took his cuddle when feeling excited or to calm him down. With Finn it was also an expression of anxiety. Perhaps something similar with bear, as an explanation of the video? He is probably not feeling very well and perhaps he likes a something like a toy to calm him down like Finn does with his cuddle?
The irony is , we always prided ourselves on having a calm house, and said it had helped to make Monty into the relatively chilled and laid back dog he is ( read lazy, cos we are a bit!)
We have never had streams of people in and out the house, we speak calmly, don't raise our voices, have a bit of routine but love a weekend lie in, generally our house is calm and there's a semblance of routine on weekdays. So, apart from the postman, deliveries and the occasional visitor, I don't think Bear is being overstimulated. Maybe we are so utterly boring that the Amazon driver delivering kitchen towel is a highlight!
.
But I do get what you are saying. Our dog walker arriving at 10.30 sends them both into an excitement frenzy as they know what's going to happen. I don't attempt to do anything about that as I can't replicate it every day. I accept the ten seconds of madness and the dog walker has the pick up honed to a fine art.
I think of him as a super confident dog, but maybe he has some anxieties I'm just not seeing. Or, I've just not set enough boundaries and more often than not he gets some sort of ( delayed) food treat after the mouthing, justifying him trying it so often.
We have never had streams of people in and out the house, we speak calmly, don't raise our voices, have a bit of routine but love a weekend lie in, generally our house is calm and there's a semblance of routine on weekdays. So, apart from the postman, deliveries and the occasional visitor, I don't think Bear is being overstimulated. Maybe we are so utterly boring that the Amazon driver delivering kitchen towel is a highlight!
. But I do get what you are saying. Our dog walker arriving at 10.30 sends them both into an excitement frenzy as they know what's going to happen. I don't attempt to do anything about that as I can't replicate it every day. I accept the ten seconds of madness and the dog walker has the pick up honed to a fine art.
I think of him as a super confident dog, but maybe he has some anxieties I'm just not seeing. Or, I've just not set enough boundaries and more often than not he gets some sort of ( delayed) food treat after the mouthing, justifying him trying it so often.