So sorry you are feeling down, Natalie! It must be so frustrating and depressing. I don’t have a lot to add, except that one of the best pieces of advice I got from you guys when we first had Simba and he was a manic jumper/biter was to think about an alternate behaviour that you want him to do at that moment and train that instead. So if he rushes at the door and jumps up at visitors, train the sit/stay when visitors come. (Ok he’s not perfect at this but

). Simba’s jumping/biting was always over-excitement and wanting to engage. So one thing that really helped me was to go outside and run with him in the backyard, which would ALWAYS trigger the jumping/biting, and then do the click/treat when he was running WITHOUT the jumping/biting. He clued in pretty quickly, actually. Then inside, when he did the jump/bite I trained the sit. Which also helped.(again, not perfect, but you get the idea).
But I will also say that sometimes we can overdo this, too. If the dog jumps/bites and then the human responds by giving attention and giving high-value treats for other fun games and training, well...why not keep up with the jump/bite? Is this reverse training in action?
One of my best friends had four kids. And when they were toddlers she ran her home like a day care. Breakfast, play time, snack, scheduled activity, etc. The point being is that she always had a schedule for them because if she didn’t, they would either fight like cats and dogs or be constantly bugging her to do something with them. But she never let them work through that. She always planned everything for them, they never learned to manage their own time. Is something similar happening with Bear?
I dunno if any of this is helpful. I know you are trying so hard to help him through this, and it’s exhausting. The behaviourist will likely be able to see things that you are just not seeing. Hopefully you can get some good advice from him/her.
