Getting desperate!

[Boogie]

Bless you, of course we won’t judge. You feel bad enough as it is - what a difficult decision to make

But admitting mistakes is important and actually a sign of strength. If you find you are unable to give him the life he needs then it’s for the best.

If you do send him back to the breeder I hope they find an experienced Lab home for him as he will need time to settle - and all Lab pups are challenging. If they do that he will be just fine. Two of my pups were in other homes until twelve weeks old and they adapted very well.
.

 

[Jen]

No one will judge you. The majority of us didn’t find the forum because we loved our dogs so much we wanted to talk about them - we were struggling with terror pups and needed help. We know how hard it is - especially on your own!

If you genuinely think it’s for the best then it’s the right thing to do for you both.

When I was considering giving Stanley back my mam made me really think if I could hand him over, having no idea what would happen to him, and walk away. It was at that moment I knew that although he was Satan in a furry outfit, I loved him and I couldn’t do it.

I’m not telling you that to make you feel any guilt, just you seem really (understandably) upset by the decision and I think you might be more attached to your little man than your anxious, sleep deprived self is letting you think.

I hope whatever decision you make you’re happy with x

 

[Selina27]

I've nothing to add that Boogie and Jen haven't said. You must do what is right for yourself and George, no judgement.

 

[FayRose]

Totally agree with the other posts here.
It is VERY difficult to anticipate ahead of time if you are going to cope with a demanding pup. Sometimes you have no other option than to make that tough decision for both of you.

 

[Oberon]

Your mental health is important. And although puppies do get a hundred times easier eventually, every dog needs a lot of time, thought and attention for life. If that’s not the path for you after all there is no shame in it.

We got our dog Obi when he was 9 months old, when his former owners came to the same point that you feel you might be at. Obi is happy with us and has a good life. I’m glad his original owners decided they couldn’t keep him... It’s not wrong to seek a different set of circumstances for your pup, in which you both end up happier.

 

[Granca]

Just another message of support for you here. I can’t add anything else either, except that I’m glad that you will involve George’s breeder if you decide not to keep him. It’s a tough time. Do let is know how it goes.

 

[HAH]

Huge sympathy with you @Georgesmum - exactly as others have said, no judgment at all; it’s an exceptionally tough decision to face and whichever way you decide you need to do the best for you. If it helps to share the difficulties then please do, but if not don’t feel any pressure x

 

[Georgesmum]

Thankyou for your support past and present, I’ve composed a text to her this is it, I could lie and say work issues or allergies but I’ve been brought up with he honesty is the best policy theory so the hard truth it is


Hi,

This is a terrible text i’m sending you, and I’m so sorry for it I’m going to be totally honest with you because that’s the way I am, I just can’t cope with George. I enormously underestimated how hard it would be to raise a puppy, I just can’t do it on my own, I had various offers of help before I got him and lo and behold as soon as I need them, they’re too busy

I’m back to work on Monday and I just can’t be popping back because I’m worried about him screaming, I can’t afford to lose my job. I’m worried sick about that part especially.



I know it would best if I brought him back to you, I’m pretty sure he’s young enough not to be traumatised by a change of scenery and owner, I’d rather admit defeat now and give him up than leave it a few weeks and traumatise the boy

I dont feel I can give him the life he needs/deserves



He’s good at night, 10 -4:30am he eats well, he’ll sit and wait for his dinner, he’s good at recall, and he’ll ask to go outside to the toilet.

He’s very bitey, and launches at hands and faces, and no amount of correction is working on him at all, he’s pierced my lip and had my nose, my son won’t bring my granddaughter round anymore in case he does the same to her.



Not sure of your thoughts on this, I’m so very very sorry, I thought I’d be able to cope, turns out reality is completely different to my imaginings.



Please let me know

 

[snowbunny]

Don't be too hard on yourself. I don't think anyone can truly prepare themselves for the rollercoaster that puppy parentdom can be. I read the whole of the internet before my first puppy arrived and I was still totally unprepared for the reality. The important thing is that you're considering the best future for the both of you; if you continue to be unhappy, so will he be. It's quite common for people to have the puppy blues, but if you sit down and think, in all honesty, that the best thing for both of you is to return him to his breeder, then it's the kindest and bravest thing you can do. As @Oberon has said, your mental health is important, and his quality of life is important. Too many people end up shutting the puppy away completely because they can't cope, but are unwilling to let the puppy go.

Good luck and, whatever you decide, we'll be here for you.

 

[snowbunny]

Ah, we crossed posts. Big hugs, this must be really hard for you. George will be fine, don't worry, this won't traumatise him. He sounds like a very robust little man

 

[edzbird]

You have been very honest and very brave. I have complete admiration for you.

 

[Stacia]

I am sure the breeder will understand, you can't be the first one unable to cope and it best for both you and George. In fact I met a lady a coupe of days ago with a Lab which she had bred and the new owner couldn't cope after one week, so took him back, he has had a long and happy life with the breeder. If you are stressed about going to work, it isn't going to do you or George any good, you have made the wisest and best decision x

 

[kateincornwall]

Oh bless you , but better now than months down the line . I wish you all the best , I can understand totally and applaud your total honesty xx

 

[Georgesmum]

Thankyou all, this is really hard

What if she won’t or can’t take him back?

 

[Aitch]

I expect she will take him but if not then come back here and tell us. I'm sure we can help you find him a new home somehow
I'm so sorry you have had such a hard time. I don't think anyone would blame either you or George for any of this. Bless you for doing what is best for the little fellow.

 

[Atemas]

Just read where you are at @Georgesmum. I really feel for you as I was in the same place as you two years ago but I had my DH’s support, even though I know I drove him to the edge at times - we stuck it out and now have the most loving dog. BUT I am home a lot and don’t have the worry of a job to get to and a dog to leave. I was in a dark place for a while and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

As regards George - our older dog Sky was returned to the breeder at 5 months through no fault of her own. It must have been heartbreaking for her first owners to give her up but we were so very lucky to get her. I hope the breeder will take him and find a loving home for him.

Don’t forget we are all here to support and not judge. Take care.

 

[Oberon]

I’m sure this is very tough.

Don’t worry about what-ifs.

Your text is honest and clear. If you are ready to send it just see what she says.

 

[Georgesmum]

Im waiting till my mum gets here before I send it, moral support and tissue giver

 

[Cath]

Try not to worry

 

[Loraseal]

I know this is very tough for you. But as everybody here says....no judging and we are all here to support you. Have a good cry and a cuddle with your Mum.