Wishing it were different .

[kateincornwall]

As most of you know , my grandson was extremely bonded to my late boy Sam , who died 15 months ago well before his time . He and Silas were together as often as possible and were from the moment we got Sam as a nine week old puppy, sharing beach trips , long walks and holidays . Silas would come over to us very often and it was lovely to see him come in and give Sam a massive hug before saying Hello to us !
We got Reuben because we wanted another Labrador in our lives , one last pup to join us and in my naïve mind , I thought that Reuben and Silas would become best pals , not ever a replacement , but pals all the same . Sadly this isn't happening at all , the little lad rarely comes over , showing zero interest in Reuben who adores him . In our recent snow , Reuben was looking out of the window watching Silas and his friends building a snowman , whining in delight , itching to go and see Silas, but when I asked if I could bring Reuben out to see them , Silas said " No thanks Nanny , he might spoil the snowman " . Logical I suppose, but oh how I wish things were different , wish they could be pals . Reuben is boisterous no doubting that, but then Sam, serious most of the time, could also be boisterous when he was a puppy and got excited . I suppose there is nothing I can do , if Silas doesn't want to come walks any more , maybe when Reuben grows up a little more, but no point banking on it !! Never mind , I cant force love , we love him and that's that x

 

[Cath]

Give it time Kate, I am sure when Reuben is older they will be good friends

 

[Charlie]

I can understand your sadness Kate, but I wonder if when Reuben grows up Silas might bond with him then. Also Silas is growing up has different interests etc. Sometimes there just isn't the same connection. I truly hope things change and they have a lovely friendship. xx

 

[Jen]

Try not to forget as well Kate that Silas is a lot older now. He may have been similar with Sam had you got him now.

Sam might have just been the right friend at the right time, which is how I always think we get our true friends x

 

[Aitch]

It's very early days yet. Give him time and he will come around, I'm sure.

 

[kateincornwall]

Suppose it was a pipe dream really , you`re right too , Silas is 11 now , so his interests are very different to what they used to be . Maybe when Reuben grows up ( hahaha ! ) or maybe Sam was just that one dog in a million for Silas xx

 

[Loraseal]

I would also give it time. My son is now 11 and he is not the same quiet boy from 18 months ago. Puberty has arrived early and this might also play a factor with his relationship with Reubs. Just give it time and they will also have a special bond , just different. X

 

[Jacqui-S]

I am sad for you Kate, sorry Silas hasn't bonded in the same way as with Sam.
I agree with the others though - Silas is at a different stage in his life now, with different needs and aspirations.
Reuben has already helped with your healing. Time. Just be patient. You will all be there for Silas if or when he needs support, Reuben included.

 

[Jennifer]

I was thinking the same as has already been posted when I read your post Kate. Silas is a lot older now than when you got Sam. I'm guessing he was only 3/4 when you got Sam and grew up with him. Unfortunately, for many reasons, an 11 year old boy has a lot of different interests and things going on that don't necessarily fit a puppy. It's also a good thing though. Silas choosing to spend time with friends shows confidence, independence and that he's growing up into a sociable lad helped by you and Sam I have no doubt. I'm sure Reuban will play an important part in Silas's life just in a different way.

 

[Granca]

I was thinking the same, too, Kate. Although my grandson (now eighteen, so older than Silas) loves my dogs and has known them since they were puppies he now has other interests. The dogs adore him too, but he now has to be asked to take them out if I need him to and he no longer volunteers to come with me to the woods for a walk.

It’s lovely that Silas is becoming more confident and independent. He’ll never forget Sam and Reuben will be there for him too when he needs him.

 

[Atemas]

for many reasons, an 11 year old boy has a lot of different interests and things going on that don't necessarily fit a puppy.

He may have been similar with Sam had you got him now.

Yes

 

[Jen]

Wait until he’s 15 and he realises what a good chat up line the dog is. Bet he’s never away

 

[Emily_Babbelhund]

I know you want Reuben to help heal Silas the way he has helped you, but you are wise not to force it. As others have said, maybe it will come in time. What matters most is what is glaringly obvious every time you post about Reuben: Reubs is the right dog for YOU at the right time for YOU. Sam would be so proud and I can imagine him cheering you on with every adventure you have with Reuben and Nelly.

 

[edzbird]

I agree with all of the above, plus I bet Silas (just like everyone else who has had a puppy) has forgotten how boisterous puppy-Sam was. He remembers the grown up Sam, when they were truly bonded.

 

[kateincornwall]

I agree with all of the above, plus I bet Silas (just like everyone else who has had a puppy) has forgotten how boisterous puppy-Sam was. He remembers the grown up Sam, when they were truly bonded.

Spot on , now I really think about it . Silas was only three years old when Sam arrived , so I guess his memories will be faded and yes, the adult Sam was who he will think of . Time will tell with Reubs , no use worrying over it , he is much loved so that's the important thing xxx

 

[Stacia]

I agree with all the others, Silas is growing up and his interests are changing. He will learn to love Reuben when Reuben is older, a puppy can be very boisterous and maybe he is a little 'concerned' about that. He remembers Sam as an adult dog. On a sadder note, maybe he is wary of loving and losing, perhaps you could get him to gently open up if he needs to do so.

 

[Lab_adore]

 

[HAH]

I think how you’re feeling is entirely natural. My nephew is only a year older than Silas, and his whole world has changed so much just in the last couple of years - what he values, what his priorities are, how he sees himself - that I think it is more likely that he’s simply at a different place in his life and is bound to have a different relationship with Reuben. it might be that this changes as he grows up, but it might not - and it’s possibly just a new phase of grandson/pup interaction. As @Jen says, he’ll soon cotton on to how the best girls and boys are dog fans, and you won’t be able to walk Reuben without him!

 

[MellowYellow]

Ah Kate - it's lovely that you are such a caring Nanny to your dear Silas. He sounds such a nice boy, and I am happy that he has a group of friends he plays outside with (so many just hang around indoors playing video games). Give it time, don't push things, he may well come round to Reuben. And if not, well you know that he and Sam had that very special bond, it's not something that will ever leave him. xxx

 

[Natalie]

I agree with everything that has been said before.... it's just different this time, I suppose xxx