@David your talking about Lady's deafness brings back funny memories of Brogan, who was deaf during his last couple years. I was really distressed when I figured out he'd lost his hearing. However I realised it didn't bother him one bit. In fact, he used it to his advantage!
He already knew a lot of hand signals, but I taught him more, for example recall and turning cues. The recall cue was me waving my arms over my head, as that could be seen from a good distance.
Unlike my Spanish Señor who says, "Recall, what is that?", Brogan's recall was always excellent. Much to my surprise, he turned a bit naughty old man with a wicked sense of humour passed the age of 11. If I'd give him the recall cue and he didn't want to come because something else better was on offer (usually a pet or treat from one of his human buddies in the park), he'd very purposefully turn his head away from me. "La, la, la... I can't HEAR you!" he was clearly saying. If I'd then get close enough to him to manoeuvre around to the direction he'd turned his head and signal again, he'd just flip his head around the other way! "La, la, la... I STILL can't hear you!"
The only real problem? His antics made me laugh so much - and he liked to make me laugh - that it just encouraged his old coot hooliganism. He was a joy as a young dog but I honestly loved Brogan as a deaf old man even more. Of course it made me sad that his being old meant that my time with him wasn't going to last forever, but what fun my old man was.
Hopefully Lady and you will adjust so that she doesn't have any more frights from surprise approaches. I don't know if it would with Lady, but I used to gently touch Brogan on the side of his face to signal that he needed to look at me for a hand cue. Starting with a face touch also helped me to remember to always approach him from the front.
