Reminds me of the Seinfeld episode when Elaine went to stay at Jerry’s parents’ house in Florida and woke up with a stiff neck. The dreaded, uncomfortable sofa bed came up in many episodes! I think the father refused to replace it, too! (We watched the entire series a few months ago. Best laugh!)
The Labraventures of Carbón, Spanish (ex-) foster dog extraordinaire
- Thread starter Emily_Babbelhund
- Start date
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
I love him and want to spend time with him. However...I'm, um...really not good living with someone and will have little privacy or space for five weeks. That's on me - I'm very much an introvert and need my alone time - so living cheek to jowl with anyone for that long would be "challenging". Also his negativity about almost everything kind of wears on me even on an hour long phone call, let alone five weeks of togetherness. Donna really tempered that aspect - she didn't let him be so gloomy about everything and she had a very youthful enthusiasm for life which was infectious - but his natural negativity really come roaring back since she passed.How are you feeling about 5 weeks of your Dad?
On the positive side, I will not be battling tax issues this time, I've decided not to try to get his finances in order this time, I don't have a goal of cleaning out my storage container this time (i.e. giving away every item I've kept since I've been on the planet), and I'd like to try to get him out for some different types of activities so we have SOMETHING else to talk about.
Also I'll go up to my friend Mimi's at least twice.
But yeah, there's a bit of 'silent scream' going on in my head as I count down the days.
Jacqui-S
Moderator
- Location
- Fife, Scotland
Can you "go off travelling" for a bit? Even if it's the next town with a dog friendly apartment?I love him and want to spend time with him. However...I'm, um...really not good living with someone and will have little privacy or space for five weeks. That's on me - I'm very much an introvert and need my alone time - so living cheek to jowl with anyone for that long would be "challenging". Also his negativity about almost everything kind of wears on me even on an hour long phone call, let alone five weeks of togetherness. Donna really tempered that aspect - she didn't let him be so gloomy about everything and she had a very youthful enthusiasm for life which was infectious - but his natural negativity really come roaring back since she passed.
On the positive side, I will not be battling tax issues this time, I've decided not to try to get his finances in order this time, I don't have a goal of cleaning out my storage container this time (i.e. giving away every item I've kept since I've been on the planet), and I'd like to try to get him out for some different types of activities so we have SOMETHING else to talk about.
Also I'll go up to my friend Mimi's at least twice.
But yeah, there's a bit of 'silent scream' going on in my head as I count down the days.
It would do my head in too.
A week holiday with the MIL was ok, but a fortnight let alone 5 weeks would just kill me (or her). And I get on FAR better with the MIL than I ever did with my own Mum.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Good idea, but as close as I'll get there is going to my friend Mimi's in Reno for a break. And don't get me wrong, that means the world.
But for the other, prices of Airbnbs and hotels even up to the Oregon border (over 8 hour drive) are well beyond my limit. I tried that last visit, and I looked for something before this visit too. Absolutely nothing. I'm willing to bust my budget in the cause, but not bust it into the stratosphere of 4x my upper limit.
My original plan was to stay this long to both visit my father and ease the issue of my rent in Regensburg doubling over the summer. Fly to dad's for nothing (frequent flyer miles), stay for a month and put that savings into the following month in Regensburg. Well, no frequent flyer tickets available (duh, it's SUMMER) and the ticket price more than what I would have paid in Regensburg for rent. It's all kind of fallen apart in the budget sense. But I still needed and wanted to see my father, so that's stayed the same at least.
And just now I've gotten two notices from the IRS, which means that first item of mine above ("I won't be battling tax issues this time") just slid off the table. It's fine, I'll deal - I'm still healthy and safe! - but I kind of want to have a big adult toddler cry!
Jacqui-S
Moderator
- Location
- Fife, Scotland
Wish so much we could help 
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
That really means a lot, even if this is a situation of my own making and again I'm "healthy and safe" (repeating that more for myself).Wish so much we could help
And as to keeping me sane during my dad visit, I have two additional aces up my sleeve: my wonderful buddy Mimi up in Reno and my amazing (his favourite word) coach, Taylor. @kateincornwall told me as I was blubbering on her shoulder before leaving Cornwall to take this time in Spain to really think about what I want to do in the future, and that's no less true of the time in the US. Already this year has seen a ton of changes, let's see what I can magic up for next year in terms of either getting off the travel wheel or re-making the wheel into something that fits my current age and stage.
But thank goodness for you and my forum friends. Seriously: very, very grateful.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Oh mis amigos, she talks and talks and talks, mi ML. Luckily for me, she also walks and walks and walks. Today we did NOT go to Sevilla, mainly because again she lay in the bed like a dead fish at 5am when we should have been leaving for the big city. Vale, I also was laying the bed like a dead fish (why is that negative, in fact? I LOVE dead fish!). Donde estaba, where was I? Oh si, what we did today.
Today we went to Caños de Meca and Barbate. Caños is a beautiful NO DOGS beach so we did not stop, but we walked in the pine forest and coast trail between Caños and Barbate. Barbate is a fishing city that has a very important TUNA MUSEUM but otherwise looks like a place that you have to pay something weekly to the local mafia so that they do not burn down your shop. But amigos, the walk on the cliff over the ocean is sublime!
I did get a leeeetle too hot, but ML gave me lots of water and let me take rests in the shade before continuing on. The funniest thing was that when we returned to the car, a man had set up his whole campsite (chairs, cooler, table, surfboard) behind our little TARDIS. ML was not having it and told him that he needed to move all that stuff because I was hot and needed a drink and to go home for the rest of the day.
Then the man told ML that he had a puppy in his car and she got really mad (but did not show it as she has learned from the Eeeenglish to be oh so polite even when people are horrible) and was ready to rescue that poor puppy. He went into the car to get the puppy and came out with a jug of water. FOR ME! It turns out the word for "puppy" and the word for "jug" are almost exactly the same and ML had made a BIG mistake!
In fact, de hecho, the man was very nice, making sure I had water to drink (ML had this already but the thought was what counted) and then he flirted with my ML and tried to speak German to her, which is funny because she is American, I am Spanish, the TARDIS is Japanese and exactly NONE of us are German. Meanwhile he moved all of his camping gear and told us to have a wonderful day as we left.
Ves, you see? Sometimes people seem like jerks at first but really they are very nice if you give them a chance (and maybe improve your Spanish a bit, eh, ML?)!
The walk was pretty good too, but amigos, I have to tell you - I am missing Cornwall temperatures and right now I would not even mind some wet from above!
Today we went to Caños de Meca and Barbate. Caños is a beautiful NO DOGS beach so we did not stop, but we walked in the pine forest and coast trail between Caños and Barbate. Barbate is a fishing city that has a very important TUNA MUSEUM but otherwise looks like a place that you have to pay something weekly to the local mafia so that they do not burn down your shop. But amigos, the walk on the cliff over the ocean is sublime!
I did get a leeeetle too hot, but ML gave me lots of water and let me take rests in the shade before continuing on. The funniest thing was that when we returned to the car, a man had set up his whole campsite (chairs, cooler, table, surfboard) behind our little TARDIS. ML was not having it and told him that he needed to move all that stuff because I was hot and needed a drink and to go home for the rest of the day.
Then the man told ML that he had a puppy in his car and she got really mad (but did not show it as she has learned from the Eeeenglish to be oh so polite even when people are horrible) and was ready to rescue that poor puppy. He went into the car to get the puppy and came out with a jug of water. FOR ME! It turns out the word for "puppy" and the word for "jug" are almost exactly the same and ML had made a BIG mistake!
In fact, de hecho, the man was very nice, making sure I had water to drink (ML had this already but the thought was what counted) and then he flirted with my ML and tried to speak German to her, which is funny because she is American, I am Spanish, the TARDIS is Japanese and exactly NONE of us are German. Meanwhile he moved all of his camping gear and told us to have a wonderful day as we left.
Ves, you see? Sometimes people seem like jerks at first but really they are very nice if you give them a chance (and maybe improve your Spanish a bit, eh, ML?)!
The walk was pretty good too, but amigos, I have to tell you - I am missing Cornwall temperatures and right now I would not even mind some wet from above!
Lisa
Moderator
- Location
- Alberta, Canada
This all sounds very challenging! I suppose if you prepare yourself going in as yo what it is like you can somewhat prepare. Going to your friend’s place is good. Maybe you should book a couple of weekends in an Airbnb “away” just to get the alone time recharge?I love him and want to spend time with him. However...I'm, um...really not good living with someone and will have little privacy or space for five weeks. That's on me - I'm very much an introvert and need my alone time - so living cheek to jowl with anyone for that long would be "challenging". Also his negativity about almost everything kind of wears on me even on an hour long phone call, let alone five weeks of togetherness. Donna really tempered that aspect - she didn't let him be so gloomy about everything and she had a very youthful enthusiasm for life which was infectious - but his natural negativity really come roaring back since she passed.
On the positive side, I will not be battling tax issues this time, I've decided not to try to get his finances in order this time, I don't have a goal of cleaning out my storage container this time (i.e. giving away every item I've kept since I've been on the planet), and I'd like to try to get him out for some different types of activities so we have SOMETHING else to talk about.
Also I'll go up to my friend Mimi's at least twice.
But yeah, there's a bit of 'silent scream' going on in my head as I count down the days.
and you are very handsome Carbon 
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Nothing affordable within an 8 hour drive of my father's that I'd also consider safe. And I have a pretty generous definition of "affordable".
Lisa
Moderator
- Location
- Alberta, Canada
Ugh that’s too bad!
When do you go, Emily? Are you driving back to Regensberg and then going immediately? It’s one of the problems of having ‘state visits’ when family/friends live so far away. ‘Little and often’ is less stressful, but not possible.
Maybe trying to focus on planning the next few months will help, especially if Cornwall is a big part of it.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Hola amigos, I finally got to go to the beach last night, que bien! We visited amiga Miry and took a walk. This is also a NO DOGS beach at this time of year, but it is not a tourist beach so NO ONE CARES. We also got to walk with Miry's dogs and play in a nice park. I am a happy Señor.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
We go to the US the first week of July and yes - back to Regensburg for two nights and then fly out.
Yes, absolutely! Much better would be a once a week visit if I were local or 2-3 days every month if I lived a little further away. But going so far and especially travelling with Carbon (who is a star, but it still...), even a couple weeks seems too short. Although that's what I used to do and may do again, depending on this trip.
No more Cornwall for me until next year due to UK immigration rules. But Florence and Venice are on the docket for October/November, and that's a good thing to look forward to. Of course don't hold me to that if I end up deciding to decamp somewhere completely different - nothing booked yet!Maybe trying to focus on planning the next few months will help, especially if Cornwall is a big part of it.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
Again hijacking Carbon‘s thread to say that I fulfilled a lifelong dream today to swim with my dog. Thank you my sweet Señor and of course to ‘amiga’ Helen who let a dodgy duo take over her pool on a Tuesday morning!
- Location
- Cornwall , UK
Oh now that looks wonderful , nice and cool . It must be so good to swim with our dogs , bliss xx
- Location
- Malvern Worcestershire
That must have been heaven.
Emily_Babbelhund
Mama Red HOT Pepper
- Location
- Regensburg, Germany
If I had my own pool, this would be it. Perfect size and depth, salt water (no chlorine) and I love the beautiful color of the tiles.
Helen and David (the owners) bought their house five years ago and it was a complete disaster (including the pool which was essentially just a hole in the ground) and the last I saw it, it was still a construction zone. They kept the house the same size (small - easier to care for), did up the pool and garden with gusto, including all drought-friendly plants that are thriving. I really admire people who have a vision and the patience and fortitude to execute it.
This is their retirement home where they plan to stay permanently after traveling the world and living in exotic locales their whole lives (they are Brits who worked in the travel industry) and they so deserve to enjoy it.