Hello everyone. It’s me, the Pig! I’ve been away a long time. Mummy said it’s been a DifficultTime and she has been sad for a while. It’s not been too bad for me as I have had my ears stroked a lot. But she’s a bit happier now and let me come back on here and say hello to my pig-friends. I’m glad she did as I need to report a heinous crime, I didn’t get a present at Christmas, and to make things worse that kibble brain Seren the labra-stoopid-poodle-beard came and bothered me all afternoon and broke my squeaky snakey! I did get to eat some prime sheep poo though so not all bad. And, there wasn’t any bangy fire-in-the-sky a few nights ago which I was pleased about. Pig-mummy says she will send a fotoe of my mighty-fine velvety face soon. She says it is grey now and I look like an old lady. I think I look very wise. Love, the Pig x
bye.
Is it the same for you?
Hmm seems like lots of us are grey and wise here now. Pig-mummy says wise is when you know how to behave yourself. But she is wrong, wise is knowing how to steal the Pip’s toast that she has left on the table just when pig-mummy is busy loading the dishwasher. And wise is also knowing when to drag mummy all the way across the field when the farrier has been so I can get those delicious hoofy shaving nibbles. And wise is also running back to my Pig-nest as fast as my velvety paws will carry me when I see it is raining outside and pig-mummy is getting out my lead. Only kibble brains go out in the rain, as all Wise Pigs know. Anyway I better go, I just sneaked and weasled a whole Brussels sprout stick out of the compost heap and ate it all in the garden and now I need to lie in my pig-nest and make bottom-stinks. I’ll make sure to look surprised and then glare accusingly at Pig-daddy each time I do one. Because that is very wise too and it makes Pig-mummy laugh. Love, the Pig.
